Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Go down, like some disgraced cosmonaut

Well, that was a tad bit more difficult than I had thought it would be, but everything's taken care of now.

Poor little Miriam. I really had hoped she'd be able to see things our way by this point. Killing her was not the most fun thing I've ever done. There'd been far too much trouble in that town, so Master felt it was pertinent to do a little house cleaning. Nothing a little mass memory-alteration couldn't fix, right? Miriam's little friend, what was her name? Betty? Whatever. Had to get rid of her entirely. Well, almost entirely. We let her memory live on with her dear old chum, for as long as she lasted anyway. From what we could ascertain, the Wooden Girl's long gone, probably after the Book since I apparently left for Lucy at some point last week.

I do believe I'm rambling. Forgive me, the last two weeks have been rather odd, to say the least. Anyway, we had to tie up all the loose ends here in town, and that meant Miss Shawe. With everyone having lost all knowledge of all the weird shit that's been going on, I was able to freely stroll down the street once again. It was quite enjoyable, I must say, not having those blue-suited assholes watching all the time anymore. Or puppets, not that I knew about those before. I knocked on the door and when I received no response, I promptly kicked it in. Ah, then I saw the reason for my being left outside was not simply rudeness, the young lady was already entertaining guests. One rather important guest, rather. Master had already arrived. How splendid!

We were there a few minutes, we gave her a chance to join us and all that shit, but she wouldn't have it. And so Master went to work. He picked her up with two of His tentacles and tossed her across the room, smashing apart a bookcase and I believe one of her arms. She tried to get to her feet, but Master grabbed her again and lifted her into the air and then bringing her down onto the marble coffee table. A couple times. At some point she was knocked out and Master chucked her through the window. I walked on over and suddenly Master was outside as well. He stood over her, and I felt a cold breeze. Some black leaves fluttered by. We were on the Path now and Master picked her up and moved into the trees, but He stopped at the edge and peered at me with his non-existent eyes. One of His tentacles shot towards me and hit me in the chest.

Next thing I remember, I'm back in town and back at the spot where I got the Book from Doc. Waiting for me there was some freaky lookin' dude wearing a trenchcoat. I was positively terrified, the possibility of shrivelled old-man dick suddenly being shoved in my face seemed high. I mean come on, normal respectable folk don't wear trenchcoats. But luckily this was not some homeless old flasher, but one of the higher ups come to give me my new orders. So really, not a whole lot of difference. He had some kind of English accent I think, and he called himself Legacy. All these folks with the stupid pretentious names and I'm the one who's supposed be nuts, it's a fucked up world I tell ya.

Now backing up a bit, perhaps it would be a good idea for me to cover what happened in the time between the delivery of the Book and all the events I just described. It might be a good idea, but fuck if I can remember much. Lucifer already covered the basics of it, Madi tried to steal the Book while under the influence of the Wooden Girl and I knocked her out a window. What? There was a dumpster underneath and from what I understand she only ended up with a concussion and a broken arm. Nothing serious. After this little incident, I discovered more of the Wooden Bitch's flunkies were waiting outside the door when they suddenly rushed in and jumped me. I had grabbed the Book from Madi and still had it in hand when I opened a door to the Empty City to get away, maybe not an ideal plan since of course they were able to just follow me in. But fuck, whatever. So I'm runnin' through the streets of the Empty City with a homicidal puppet and her minions on my tail, with little chance to fight as I had regrettably left my gun back in the hotel. Eventually, I came to a door and... I don't know, I just felt drawn to it. So I went through this door and...

That's the last thing I recall until I woke up back in the hotel on Thursday with Master there telling me we needed to finish up business here and move on. And then we did the stuff that I already described above. In short, I have no idea what those weird messages I apparently left last week are about, so you can fucking not worry about it. Or do, since it would keep you distracted so you won't notice me sneaking up behind you with a hatchet. I like that plan better, let's go with that, what do you say?

So anyway, I met with Legacy. Legacy told me I was going after Lucy and Madi to retrieve the Book. Because I totally wasn't planning on doing that, I was gonna go get smashed at the local bar and probably get arrested. I mean it was something I was considering, but really, I wasn't actually gonna do it. He wasn't completely useless though, as he did have some information regarding what exactly the Book was, as well as a tiny bit of information some of his people had managed to dig up about Oblivion. I'll post that sometime later though, because frankly I'm getting bored of sitting here. And anyway I'm tired of listening to the old pervert telling me that we should be going because his people have managed find Lucy-boy staying in some town in the next state. Nebraska. I'm sure that's loads more fascinating than Wyoming, just loads. Then again, I guess it ain't exactly been quiet here, has it?

I shall do my best to get back and brighten up your day once again as soon as I possibly can. Until then, though, stay frosty.

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