Thursday, December 15, 2011

Do as you are told and maybe then we'll let you out

A day or two, I said. Or, y'know, maybe four. It's not like we're in China or anything, so four is good, right?

I must apologize, my peeps, I did not intend to be gone for such a period, but there was business to be taken care, y'know. Quite unavoidable. But then I didn't really expect those guys to be able to see through a perception filter. That's not the kind of thing you can just pick up on the street. Salieri must've paid an assload for 'em.

See, what had happened was, Jonas wanted us to take out his competition, a distinguised gentleman who goes by the name of Salieri. I'm not making this shit up, I swear that's actually his name. Salieri has been gettin' up in Jonas' business lately, and as you can imagine, the bossman was none too happy about that. A simple job really, used to handle this kind of shit all the time, maybe not folks in such a high position, but important people nonetheless.

We had a nice setup. Very simple. Have the twins shoot the bastard from the roof, use the Path to get out. Nice, quick, no problem. Of course unforeseen problems had to arise. Namely the fact that one of Salieri's bodyguards found our snipers the moment they arrived and security was on it soon enough. Which brings me to the point I brought up above. We had them filtered, just as a little extra precaution, but that didn't seem to bother security much. Well, most of the guards were confused and couldn't find their targets, but there were enough that apparently could see through the filter that we had to get out of there. Arpeggio got out fine through the Path, but Cadence got nabbed by security quick and Glorianna had to go in and pull him out.

Yeah cos, I'm gonna keep using your real name on here. What the fuck are you gonna do about it?

Oh, she also wasn't very happy that I called her back out here just to act as backup. I don't know what she's bitching about, she ended up getting to go in and fight shit anyway.

What's that? You say you don't think that what I described could've possibly filled four whole days? Well fuck you, that's the story you're gettin', you spoiled little asshole. And I'm not gonna tell you my secret now. 'Cause it's fucking awesome and amazing and it makes me look like the baddest motherfucker on earth. And I'm fucking clever too. That's right, I figured shit out. But you don't get to know about that now, you've pissed me off. So you're just gonna have to wait until we finish this shit for realz now and maybe then I might just tell y'all about what went down. Maybe, maybe not. You'll just have to wait and see.

Stay frosty, hosers. We're always watching.


  1. Ridley. Brother. You... are indeed an amusing little man. However, I must say... that your writing style gives me far too many headaches than what is probably healthy.

  2. Aw, bro, why you gotta do me like that?

    Both of you. Man, that's just not cool.

  3. Hell glad to hear you got out of this alive Riddles it makes me happy to see your post.

  4. Aww, that's real nice. Thanks Rob. Why don't you let me buy you a beer? Just stop over any time you like.

    Stay frosty.

  5. These pictures are just.. so entertaining.

    No, I didn't just ignore most of the post. I just think it's cute that you're so paranoid.